I just woke up to a guy kissing me goodbye and leaving for class. I don't know where I am, don't have any clothes on, my underwear are gone, and the shoes I found with my dress aren't mine. He just walked in and gave me my phone. I was on my period. Come get me I will walk to the nearest intersection and wait.
my professor just told me i smelt like a brewery infront of my whole class b4 my final presentation
i could't wear that belt anymore, it was gonna make me keep shitting for the rest of the night
theyre selling pepper spray in the courtyard. hellooo atl
I've see this movie. You sext me after the bar and fall asleep mid sentence. Roll credits.
Sorry you had to see that, but on the bright side...at least I trust you enough to have sex in front of you
Yea...coming from the girl who didn't understand why m&ms and tequila wasn't a "suitable diet"
filling out my bracket based on schools with ppl I've hooked up with
Update: we are pushing the start of day drinking back from 9 am to 10 am. Minor delay.
Call me old-fashioned, but I don't think the words, "Finger my ass" should find their way into casual conversation.
Then he claimed me as his prize for 3rd place in a wing eating contest. Too romantic.
I've realized that I'm going to have to wake and bake every morning to make it through the summer without killing someone. This is ridiculous.
Just check with her if girls can get blown, that's all.
I think people are normalizing furries
Well, if I’m not getting dick or sleep then I’m not interested.
Randomize
