You don't need id to drink rum in an alley.
Do you have any cake mix? I kind of need to make a "im sorry i drank all your parents tequila, threw up all over your floor and slept with you boyfriend" cake.
She made me add her as a friend on fb before she got into my bed... I sense a stalker
so what if he's got a new girlfriend. the guy i'm fucking has an english accent. i win.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Scott woke me up by cracking a beer open in my face. Best friends are awesome.
These hangoverless Sunday mornings are becoming too regular.
I was high and he had on a gorilla suit. Of course I had to take a picture with him
Your a disgrace to smokers everywhere
Yeah, he's passed out in my bathroom pantsless. Is it a faux pas to look at his penis?
Hurry up I'm getting mooned by a hobo
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
If he doesn't fuck you on the 4th of July, he doesn't really love this country.
Pooled our money and rented a bouncy castle for the day. Get over here now. Bring vodka.
Why the fuck am I at this dorm meeting? I don't pay $50,000 a year to stay sober.
You is single now. The world is your ass buffet.
I'm sitting in the car vaping at an elementary school to try and deal with the stress of existing. About how i thought being 30 would go for me tbh
I think it stinks she’s cheating on him. My vagina on the other hand is tingly thinking about a summer of sexual healing
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