morning outfit: hottub soaked skirt. no underwear. someone's bandanna worn as a shirt. took me an hour to walk home. this isn't fun anymore.
When are you freeeeeeeeee?
My phone auto corrected that to freeeeeeeeeedoooooooooom. That's kinda awesome.
she starting giving me head in the taxi..the driver told her to stop..she looked up, said "I'm the birthday girl", and kept on doing what she was doing.
How fortunate humanity is that it need not rely on the female orgasm for procreation
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I just found puke in my bra..
We had sex in the bathroom. Then he told me I could watch him pee.
even the AIR tastes like tequila.
Only time i ever look at my online banking statement is to see when i left the bar.
If my mom walks in on me masturbating one more time I'm moving out
You'd think the first few times would have been enough
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You know it's been awhile when the imagery of fucking AT A DENNY'S gets me really turned on.
just found out that she named her cat after me.
You're wearing a hospital gown and pearls. Let's reevaluate your life.
But that's fine. Because I am an independent woman who is going to pull some jane Goodall shit and save the world one day......or be a porn star......either way they are going to wish they had fucked me.
its the pipe that keeps on giving. Just when I think it's done, I scrape just enough. It's a st. Patrick's day miracle!
Is it still sex if there's no nudity, no orgasms, but the neighbors bang on the wall and ask you to stop? I've honestly forgotten.
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