Guy having heart attack in McDonalds. Classic.
I don't see why you're so upset, it's not like you were wearing pants either.
Dude. Apparently I just smoked some stuff that's used for Nigerian spirit quests.
No, we talked about it. They're cool with me living here as long as I sleep with them both.
You're a rent hooker.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
All I want to do is fuck in the bell tower before it leave this school. Is that too much to ask?
You emptied out your taco and asked the lady for a refill...and then you continued to carry out a full conversation SCREAMING
Apparently it is impossible to get kicked out of taco bell....I'll try harder next time
Poorly worded request for dick pic resulted in stoned beanie selfies and "lol". Miscommunication is the devil's cock block.
Selling our snow shovel to buy more beer. Not your brightest idea.
every time someone would wish me happy birthday I would be like "thanks happy birthday to you too"
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
If anything I look like a soccor mom going out for her annual ladies night. Trying hard, but not quite in her twenty's anymore.
Instead of saying hi she asked if she could touch your dick through your ski bib and NOW I understand why you wore it to the bars
I'm laughing at the fact that I'm at Target right now buying vitamins and alcohol.
My ex unfollowed me on SPOTIFY bruh. Freaking spotify. The butthurt is real
I'm currently hiding from this horrific thing that we call adulthood. If anyone needs me, I'll be smoking a bowl in the bouncy house.
She’s the kind of asshole whose face I want to put on a T-shirt just so I can go outside and burn it.
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