Dude, my boy c***** and I hooked up with Asian sisters last night in the same room
Then I put on blue by Eiffel 65 and security showed up and yelled at us for being too loud. Also, they stopped fucking because no one can fuck to eiffel 65
this party is like a fast-foward into the future when im 40 and married with children
iPhone photo doodle is awesome. I gave my vagina some lazers and sent it to him. He has a whole series waiting on his phone for when he gets off the plane.
I apologize for forcing you to look at my boob when we were high. It was uncalled for
I dont care how high you are "yes" is not the correct response to "what do you want from Taco Bell" Mom.
I didn't ride the struggle bus so much as drive it backwards off a cliff.
I made the jerking off hand motion to my mother by accident this morning. It was awkward for everyone involved.
is there any kind of "im boning my neighbor and he happens to be a manager at walmart" discount that our new relationship entitles me to??
It was at the same house, but a different party, when lesbians set me on fire. So there's that.
he just sent me a dick pic, it highly resembled a cheese stick
I want to see a guy holding a pizza and a bottle of scotch and a box of magnums. I'm a simple woman.
If it exists, I've probably pregamed it.
Of course that's what I'm wearing. I need to find a beard to mount and ride STAT.
I did a line of coke with my ex tonight. Talk about memories
Nothing personal but yes I would be suspicious If I saw 3 guys and 2 girls in the same bathroom stall together
Randomize
