did you wind up at some random place? and do you remember face planting into the fireplace?
Did you see Brett Michaels get knocked on his ass?
Hurt me personally.
Knocked his cowboy hat off... Bandanna was still good though
i wish i could "like" people's thoughts in real life like i can on facebook
you can....by speaking....
How do you politely bring up someone's criminal record?
Halfway through banging her I realized that she was playing a sex playlist on her iPod...first time actually having sex to R.Kelly's "bump and grind"
You said you couldnt get the condom on but "its the thought that counts"
Not sure if jager bombs can cure tuberculosis, but its a theory im testing as we speak
Just did a walk of shame dressed as a cowgirl and walked past his ex's entire sorority. Yippee kye aye, motherfucker.
In chronological order you drank, sang, smoked, napped, threw up, cried, laughed, described your pubic area, passed out. You have abused the privilege to use me as your D.D.
Last I saw, they went for a smoke and only one came back. He passed out outside. I'm glad he's only 120lbs. I left him on the rug still. My mom is gonna be pissed.
My girl came home. i was jacking off on the couch and she just starts telling me about her day, as if im not half naked with my hand on my cock.
I'm so glad you support me having casual sex with your uncle
You gave me the best orgasm of my life. I'm buying you a house
So who left their underwear on a lamppost in my aunt's backyard
I HAVE A TEST I'M SORRY YOUR UN SUCKED DICK ISN'T MY FIRST CONCERN
Randomize
