Pretty people don't get stds, I knew it
dude, the summer is killing me. i just woke up cause my balls were stuck to HER leg!
question - sack: should she or should she not play with it during foreplay?
Responsibility does not care about your dick.
I was so drunk, I was kissing everyone. Their sexual preference was none of my concern.
its not you its me. and by that i mean i am more interested in having random one night stands with random hot girls then having the same normal sex with u.
My clit is not a Gobstopper. Cut it out.
It was pretty bad. Like cum-on-my-face-while-singing-Let-It-Snow bad.
it was a frathouse cornucopia of foul mixed drinks and "sangria", which im convinced was blood and pcp
I just crawled out of bed at 5AM to make her a peanut butter and Nutella sandwich. Somewhere in the distance, I could hear whips cracking.
Well I met my booty call's parents by accident, so that happened.
I have an ideal penis or slightly above ideal penis in every country that isn't ruined by the specter of communism
The house across the street caught on fire today, Drunk people high centered their car tonight. Looking out my front window I get to watch police chases all the time. I am going to miss this place.
Are those your contacts stuck to the mirror?!
Yeah. Drunk me tried to put my contacts on the mirror where my eyes were.
You were up on table in a neon bra chanting "YOUR MOM" while drizzling vodka on your chest...
no wonder i woke up with my boobs stuck to my bra
Randomize
