Am I a whore if I make out with a boy just so michelle can't?
mom asked me why i'm never sober at family events, i told her i learned it from her.
Trying to grind with crutches was not a success
this is not real life
it never is. after midnight never counts.
How do you not remember?? She kept putting a dollar on her waistband and insisting it was all you can eat under a dollar
Is there a polite way to say "Sorry for your head injury but I still want to hook up"?
I quit life. I got pulled over on my way to work and they towed my car and dropped me off at work in a cop car
I just remember banging him and then at some point I went and took a shower and went and laid in the closet
We were fucking in the boat on the lake when another boat saw us and honked their appreciation.
I can still be you friend and be there for you. And sometimes get drunk and fuck you.
Worst wingman u don't do ANYTHING but laugh at my incompitant shyness
I don't know what happened last night. But I just woke up in the high school boiler room
Sooo...you're driving 6 hours for free booze?
Don't judge me.
FYI bail money is still in my drawer. I know you have no car but you need to know this for tomorrow.
Say thank you and give him a blowjob.
Randomize
