Saw some pubes in our toilet, hope the new look works out tonight.
mom just found 19 empty wine bottles in my closet. i hate spring cleaning
I need to sleep with 3 more guys by midnight to meet my 2010 resolution..
apparently there was a flour fight and couch sex...
She just looked down there and said "i breed horses. this is better than anything ive ever seen."
I can't tell you details but at one point I had her pee strapped to my back in a ziploc
I went full Overly Attached Girlfriend. You never go full OAG.
Sorry brah. Drastic times called for drastic measures and I had to go home and bang a cougar.
OUR DIABOLICAL SLUT PLAN HATH COMMENCED!
I just masturbated to the thought of him straight up talking to me. to us having a conversation. What the hell.
He told me to tell my ass that he loved and missed it, and even though he hasn't known it long, it might be the one for him
what food is Colorado known for?
Pot brownies.
Um, It's tempting but I'm not into coke or farmers.
Now we just need to figure out why your underwear was in your bra
Come over. Bring drugs. My sister is making cookies. She took Valium. They should be badass cookies.
Randomize