I took an adderall but just ended up meticulously arranging my farmville for hours
is it mean to send ur x his condoms back because they are too small for ur new boyfriend?
She soaked the fruit in vodka for ten minutes and then mixed it with normal fruit and sherbert icecream. It was called "lottery fruit".
Trying to take a shit right now to the beat of the fuckin drumcircle outside... It's not goin well
Think of where it's been though. That Dr. Suess book, "Oh the Places You'll go" was written for his penis.
we're like Indians of the 21st century. trading not for food and survival but personal gain and by trouble you mean getting daytime drunk and going to the roller ring then yes.
If you were a good friend you would take the nipple tassels off me before the ambulance comes.
When we were fucking he said and I quote "we're like a sex fajita"
Maybe it was that imaginary ghost dick you were stuffing in your mouth a minute ago
I guess when I black out I feel that it's not inappropriate to grope my gf in front of her parents.... But hey at least I'm starting off 2013 single
I just had to explain to an 70+ year old lady what 'coitus' was. This was not in my job description.
now that we broke up we are playing hot potato with the cock ring.. Poor thing just needs a home
I was all, oh. I've had tattoos and broken a limb. Waxing my lady parts will be a cake walk. I was wrong.
so i may or may not have just had sex on the stage of the lecture hall....
It's totally a relationship. we have sex in other people's beds, watch mad men while high and get drunk on his teammates' beer. don't you dare stomp on my dreams with your societal judgments
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