we're ranked number 5 for having the most pot in the country for a university school. idk if i should feel worried or just plain blessed.
This is so pathetic it makes me miss snorting lines alone in my room listening to 'one more drink'.
Sorry for making you give strangers a ride for hits of acid.
I'm standing outside of the bar watching homeless men teach a kid how to pee of the sidewalk.
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I'm hungover and surrounded by children and Republicans. What did I do to deserve this?
she was literally 3 feet away from the garbage can, said she couldn't make it, and then proceeded to vomit on the floor in front of everyone in the restaurant
He unbuckled his belt, tipped his hat at me, then told me to "saddle up"
this is like your 5th cowboy right? where do you keep finding these guys?!!
Its official, if she bites your dick through your jeans, ya'll go together. A lesson you shouldn't have to learn after the fact.
some kid lit a j in the bar tonight. i was in awe of both his boldness and the severe beatdown he received moments later
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You know how I know last night was a good night? Because I remember high fiving a couple WHILE they were having sex.
Beer bong just needs to be rebedazzled but it's gonna make it
Even his sexts are poetic. He said breasts instead of tits so I'm gonna lock this shit down asap
Life should not be this hard with a dick this big.
Throwing up while listening to NPR because I’m trying to adult through this hangover
Social anxiety problems: I just had to get up and change stalls mid-poop because someone sat down in the one next to mine.
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