I checked for jungle juice on Weight Watchers. they didn't have it.
We just spray painted his balls while he is passed out....I cant wait to see him try to figure this out in the morning.
on my arm i have a score card from when we apparently had a competition to see who could harden his nipples fastest..
who won?
THAT is your concern right now?
Just saw a woman with a Pomeranian in her bra. Way to step up your game Seattle.
I'm currently trying to decide if crown or wild turkey will hurt worse coming back out through my nose later.
I fucking give up. OKC is where small penises go to disappoint me.
Mass text to all of my back up boy toys. First one here wins. Mama needs some.
I just spent a pre-4th of july celebration riding in a raft being towed by a car through a town that I've never heard of handing out flyers for a river rafting company that I never knew existed. Good night.
It's a never ending cycle of men I've fucked knowing other men I've fucked. I need a new town.
i had a mental breakdown over a math asignment proposed to a glass of chocolate milk then burned my hands when i acidentally leaned on the stove i have the grill marks burned on my hands i can see them
its only been 20 minuts since i last saw you
he just fluffed my hair and told me I had to dance with him because we were both gingers.
Fly, little bird! Repopulate the ginger race!
We dated for a month and a half. he didn't like blow jobs. I honestly don't think he was human.
We are actually the same person except with opposite genitalia, which are both incredible.
Ya know, one would think a restraining order would keep me from fucking my ex.
Just realized that my booty calls are vastly ranging in penis sizes.
Randomize
