ya ever know whats down there. always send some fingers in first to scout the situation. fingers are not used for pleasure. they're used for covert missions.
I left a cheeto on everyone's car trailing to the house i'm at, hanzel and gretel style.
I'm going to start telling people I'm a sophomore so they stop asking me about college and what I want to do with my life
Judging by his buldge, this guy is huge. just paid steve to follow him into the bathroom and find out. They had a convo about it.
I dont care about anyone or anything else I just want to make love to you on my air mattress
Sorry I pulled the thermostat off the wall..
Somebody left a mini pitcher in the bathroom. Think its safe?
In fairness it was pretty good sex, but I still wasn't expecting the mass cheering and applause he got on leaving my tent
When i say that im working late and also have a paper to write before 9am tomorrow all i want u to respond is saying that ur gunna come over and sexually distract me from my responsibilities. Not a fucking frowny face.
Sorry. Im on my way.
Sitting in back of morning lecture drinking a daqueri from my pink unicorn cup. Pretty sure the girl next to me smells it.
I want to sit on top of her nipple mountains and reenact the Ricola commercial.
Yes. He better. Or I will shave a penis into his beard while he sleeps.
all i remember is slapping you in the face with a slice of pizza while laughing maniacally.
Should I wear my "kiss me I'm highrish" shirt for my drug screen today?
I'm trying to secure Christmas dick. Idgaf if he has strep or not.
Randomize
