i just googled 'classy porn'. high, low, i dunno i just got bored of cum shots.
you were definitelymotorboating random chicks as they walked out of the bar. just like, down the line. you kept yelling "Motor Boats for everyone!!!!"
i forgot what you looked like. so we left to get pizza. sorry
Someones car got stolen, everyone is yelling, and im drunk just sayin yeah buddy over and over again
how many days can you live off of Vicodin and frosty?? im going on 4 days......
get back quick. that 17 year old who peed on your car wants to do shots.
PAAAANTS ARE FOR AAAASSHOLES
I really shouldn't be this use to hearing "YOURE THAT GIRL?!?!"
She thinks I'm afraid I'm gonna get caught in one of my lies and some of the girls I'm fucking will find out about each other. But it would be a relief to offload a few from the old crop and work in a few newbies into the rotation. The organization could use some new blood.
With 4 extra seconds dedicated to the dong.
These kind of text worry me.
He took initiative. Dragged me into the kitchen and did me on the stove....while it was on! And then we made nachos.
IF THE GUY WHO I AM BORROWING OUR CAR FROM FINDS ONE CONDOM OR JIZZ STAIN IN THIS CAR HE IS GOING TO CASTRATE MY ASS. SERIOUSLY, DON'T FUCK IN THE CAR.
We fucked, she finished, high fived me, the pulled a celebratory pack of gushers out of her purse for each of us. I'm going to marry your sister dude.
a guy messaged me on POF to ask if I knew of any places that were hiring. And was being completely deadass serious. I'm so done
Sex and bbq. He sure knows how to make a girl feel special
Randomize
