That's cool how's he been?
He got hit in the face with a beer bottle so he has two black eyes and 13 stitches.. He hasnt changed much.
keep an eye on me. i'm afraid that after a few more drinks i'll ask to borrow his wheelchair.
if theres anything i pride myself on, its my ability to look homeless.
When you hit the 45 minute mark of any argument about The Flintstones, you have to realize: it's no longer you arguing, it's the cocaine arguing.
I thought you just gave him blowjobs and he criticized your drug use.
i had choclate birthday cake for breakfast and am currently flossing my teeth w a condom wrapper. at work. hot mess for 200 alex
I am sufficiently unimpressed with the options available to my freshly shaved self tonight.
After you threw up you would repeatedly say "napkin" like a siren until somebody got you a fucking napkin.
It really does creep me out though that the next ten years will involve my friends creating smaller versions of themselves because to be honest I don't know how much I like some of them. So that thought it really scary
I'm a hopeless romantic that likes rough sex. Judge me
all I know is this drummer better stop eye fucking me while he plays cowbell. it is way too early for that.
i was asked to be gay of honor by three different girls and NONE of the groomsmen at any of the weddings is open to experimenting. i mean whats the point then.
I figured you were on something. You're way too happy right now to be sober
Dude how about today while I was on lunch someone died in the break room at work....I didn't even know we had a break room!!
Turns out tits aren't quite as effective an enticement when they know for a fact that they can't touch.
Randomize
