I'm kindof freaked out about my cock not getting up this morning. Cove over later so I can sort this out. Do not post this on texts from last night.
Damn that would have been a great one. Hahah and don't worry...
I was in a gas station that sold tazers and I just saw a billboard that said "Strippers, need we say more?" God I love Georgia!
Time to put an end to this 'unprotected sex with crazy girls who have violent exes' trip I've been on so far this summer
This is why I'm not putting my name in lights over your bed.
I woke up this morning really drunk with my Christmas lights on and two owls in my bed.
swear to god, just saw some chick dressed in a full chicken costume buying eggs and telling the cashier that she "just wants her babies back."
buy whatever she's on. a lot of it.
nothing says new school year like ambulances and police road blocks.
Luckily my prof thought I was puking from nerves and gave me motivational mini speeches the entire final.
His new place is a molesden. Like a hole in the ground. It's frightening how oddly private it is.
It rubs the lotion on it's foreskin...
How's everyone else's ass tattoo today?
I just felt emotion and I'm not okay with it
ICE CREAM AND CAKE BITCHESSSSSS
Such a big mess for such a small penis
The end of the friendship was inevitable. I hooked up with her cousin and forgot to mention it to her
Can I say it was a great night out of town? Fucking my co-worker in the hotel bed while my best friend is fucking his friend on the floor and a random guy is laying in the other bed meanwhile we are all passing a joint back and forth
Randomize
