so evidently yelling "gay" everytime your bf tells you how he feels is cause for breakup. news to me
Would you rather have a 10 inch but pencil thin penis or a 2 inch very fat one?
Fat, it's not about touching the bottom it's about raising hell of the sides.
I've replaced the bottom of the food pyramid with alcohol.
Sorry I tried to blow your roommate in your room. I felt more at home there.
i just looked in the mirror i look like i'm about to film a PSA about prostitution
I HAVE A GENTLEMANLY VAGINA.
I'm starting to question if I'm gonna need to bring a raincoat just to drink around u
U act like I can cum on command
It's not even 6 am and I've already told my mom to fuck herself in the face
We are 100% horrible people, and im extremely happy we are friends
Just got to Evans to buy weed. His mom showed up unannounced. Now the three of us are chillen. Super.
I hope so much that you got average or above average dick tonight because I wish you the best
I woke up with the gnarliest cold/hangover combo
Thats what u get when u have butt ass naked rooftop sex at night in december
Worth it.
I just want to order a very large pizza and get very drunk and very laid.
Grrr. Fine. You get oral for being unwrong.
Your sister just admitted to being a " much bigger bitch" than you. So you've got that going for you, which is nice.
Randomize
