There was a point where some of my friends attempted 'moi's', which stands for makeout on introduction.
It involved going up to women and very aggressively trying to make out with them upon meeting them
Surprisingly the success rate was exceedingly high
Just soaked up some whiskey with a paper towel and then squeezed it into a cup for consumption. New low.
I miss you. Just wanted to say that before the drugs kicked in so it's legit.
Is it weird that I found myself thinking of that blue chick from Avatar while she gave me head after the movie?
He said he had to make up a lie of why he couldnt sleep with her. It must really suck to have a sunburned dick.
At the bar dressed as a taco. not a typo. Come down.
For my 21st birthday, I require a kiddy pool filled with vodka. Make it so.
i probably shouldve stopped when i uncurled the curly straw in my cocktail because it was slowing me down
this lesbian fantasy crush is getting WAY out of hand. just spent an entire meeting staring at her long fingers thinking, "oh those could be fun"
Just saw an all male dolphin threesome from underwater viewing
I just found a weed leaf in my leg hair..
There is a chick wearing some guy's shirt wrapped around her waist as a skirt... She's flashing her panties to everyone as she sings karaoke. You need to get here.
I have a strong contender for the new number 1 position for fwb. He met me at the door with pizza and a shot of patron
The best thing about this time of year is that all I have to do is add a random mardi gras decoration to my cart full of alcohol and boom, no more judging
lord you gonna make me abandon my soup for tasteful catboy nudes
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