just thought you should know that she got home at about 6am.... totally wasted. she was locked out and when i finally came to the door she was on a patio across the street with some random making hotdogs on somebodys elses bbq.
This girls a $30 bar tab from being bi
I feel like our bond is deeper now that we're both sleeping with married men. now we're really bffls
I just saw a girl licking a cheeseburger wrapper. dont ever let me get that fat
then she stuck her tongue in my ass
I thought we were talking about reason you aren't going to marry her?
it took you forty minutes to realize it was a gay bar.
Yeah i knew he wasn't okay when he told me he was "seeing his vision"
I swear this guy grew up in land without leagues. someone should inform him he's way out of mine
I need a gatorade, my back cracked, my crimper, my shot glass, a sock of rice and an explanation.
You did this to yourself.
Lucas & I had a photo shoot with her cape & I had child arm floaties on most the night.. woke up in a spiderman bed
He saw one of my bras on the floor and said "damn you could eat soup out of this"
Hot date tonight for the first time in months and I just cut my dick shaving. PRAY FOR ME.
Do not tell me I cant do drunk math ever again, AND I made a creative way of telling him I want him to fuck me.
We ended the night eating peanutbutter with our hands and smoking cigarettes in the house at 4am. Fucking Everclear, man.
Wait, you met him on Onlyfans? The guy from last night? Which one of you is the fan?
Because one of you banged your stalker
Randomize
