is there an easy way to say "i didnt plan on sleeping with you until i saw how drunk you were" ?
I just discovered how perfect a shot glass is for putting your chicken nugget dipping sauces into. Like I'll probably do this when I'm a mother feeding my children.
Just sold a bike on craig's list for 4 four lokos and a 40. How bad do you miss college?
The twins are whispering in turkish together. I think I did something bad last night.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
This is the high leading the old right now
i ordered a pipe on amazon, and under recommended items, it gave me a top hat. it knows me better than my parents.
No, not normal drunk. Wake up on a trampoline with a naked chick you've never seen before drunk. I think i missed my first trampoline sex...
My professor laid down on the floor and told us a story that involved being naked covered in Vaseline with a pumpkin on your head. No lie. This is going to be a great semester.
This is worse then when all the pharmacists sang me happy birthday while I was buying plan b
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
He wouldn't stop calling me so I sent him a text saying "I'm dead. Dead. Leave me alone." And he replied with "so can I see you then?"
My purpose is to unleash drunk self on strangers, i believe as some terrifying icebreaker, otherwise i too would offer my driving services.
Well its all fun and games until you get naked with your ex in the shower. that's NOT flirting
I think my body knows it's dying and is just shutting down
Happy birthday and sorry I punched your friend in the face
I walked in..crop dusted the whole place then asked her if she wanted to go to a place that smells better.
You were always a thinker
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