wow, farting in latex pants is really awkward.
Fuck morning classes. Fuck early work. Fuck anything in the morning that doesn't involve sleeping, sex or bacon.
I knew I was high when I wanted to write a poem about how great it felt to wash my face
considering I showed up there after a xanax, 2 bottles of champagne and some coke, no shirt and someone else s husband... I'm sure you can figure that one out.
We started telling people we were married, and then we hooked up on a park bench
It's gotten to the point that the dirty talk in my head when I touch myself has your accent
Member that time when we got super drunk and had fun and fell in love
I remember it like it was tomorrow.
Obama's speech on in 9 mins. Me in the shower now. Naked. Make your choice.
I'm bringing the tv in with me.
Don't pretend you don't want to dance on the edge of overdose all three nights
Dude, I traded weed for crunch berries. Happy Thursday.
All I have in my new place is coke and a treadmill.. it's workout Wednesday
Say whatever you bloody well like; you don't know the true meaning of life until you have smoked to a Sade cd.
This is not my bathroom and these are not my pants
There comes a point where there's just condoms and old mcdonalds in your garbage can and you can't tell if you've won or lost.
Any luck with the purse?
No, though I did find her weed. Also her sons name is King. I'm uncertain how I feel about that
Randomize
