in the practice room. just found 3 bottles of smirnoff hidden inside the piano. SO glad i didn't get into berklee...
Looking at the victoria's secret website makes the ice cream I'm eating taste like sadness and obesity
Haha im Trying. This detox stuff tastes nasty. It's bad when the only thing that came to mind when i took the first sip was how good it would be with Vodka
I may have been hammered and in a wheelchair but I definitely remember asking the hospital reseptionist to marry me
my dad just told me he wants a furry wall in the house... i'm proud and concerned
You'll be happy to know that I did indeed fracture my rib in a sex related injury
I'm starting to blur the boundary between reasonable senioritis and self-destruction. Somewhat-openly hittin the flask in 11am class
This is how I ended up being the slutty friend isn't it?
Guess who just screamed "Everything happens for a reason!!" in the abortion clinic. This girl.
Beer pong consisted of me throwing a ball at the wall and then falling over because moving my arm made me dizzy. I think our team lost.
So take that alcohol. I still win. I ALWAYS WIN. Plus i didn't have to wear clothes. DOUBLE WIN.
I cant see straight, her clothes are all over my floor and I'm covered in bite marks... No I will not go to brunch with you
pls come tAke this super bath no romo it's just. so nice.
Just so u know, "come here buckey" has no effect on ur cat, but "hey fucker you wanna get high or what?" will cause him to run from the other room knocking shit over. We smoked outta the gravity bong, then he went and ate.
I’m a women at a strip club dressed as post Malone
Randomize
