the guy I was hooking up with asked me if he could wear a guerilla suit during sex.
fyi, we didn't break up, we just downgraded to occasional sex without ever talking about it.
I am highly attracted to the men and that's all i can say. I do not clap and make noises but i do turn to the side and say how i'd do incredible things to them if given the chance
This guy at the party just introduced himself to me as "the guy who sat behind you on a plane last year"
Just ate a whole pizza by myself. Wearing my indian headdress again. its really cool with the french braids. I look like fucking pocahontas or some shit.
Crying in the liquor store is not a good look
my pupils became my eyes and i slept with a cloth in my mouth again
You don't care if I shave my legs, but you insist I be conscious for sex. Whatever. I really think your priorities are out of whack.
I didn't want to walk to anymore parties because I found a cat. It was magical.
Apparently 24 hr fitness frowns upon the ingestion of psychedelics on its premises, don't see that in the sign up contract.
Can't tell if waking up covered in easy mac is the sign of an amazing or terrible night
I'm torn between wanting to wear lipstick and wanting to make out with strangers.
I'm bringing home frosties. I need to talk about butt stuff.
Next time you decide to post pictures of yourself in your underwear on facebook, please don't tag me as your bulge.. My mom spent 10 minutes looking for me in that picture. I had to tell her I was hiding.
Was last night real life? Like did you really light your hair on fire
Randomize
