Guess what? I had way too much to drink today. I'm properly wasted. Doing chores and playing video games while drunk. It's the nexus of stupidity and responsibility.
do herpes really smell.
i can tell by the sound of your bed that he isnt that good at sex.
we're at Rob's house and just invented the best drinking game ever....we are on Chatroulette and everytime we see a dick we all have to drink.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
the theme of the baby shower is Nightmare On Prego Street
My shirt is ruined. If I ever get the idea of doing a tequila shot through my nose ever again, shoot me.
Just wrestled a cop. He won my shorts. I won my freedom. In fishnets and army boots. still headed to the party. would appreciate pants, but not necessary.
You didn't act like you were blacked out yesterday...
I didn't know
I chugged vodka from a 15 ft snorkel. What the fuck did you do with your life today?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
when I came to get Jamie there was a cop standing outside with her, made me roll down my window to tell me "she's got to go cause she won't keep her shirt buttoned"
Just so you know, your wedding is in the same place I gave my first bj.
ditto.
about cumming, not toast
Be happy for me... Or horny... Or be a really good friend and feel what I want you to feel. Jealousy
She yelled out "MCDREAMY" mid orgasm
I just spontaneously learned how to embroider at three in the morning.
I also almost burned the house down in the process. Don't ask me how. It's a long story.
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