i got turned down by a girl after she saw how big my penis was and she said "thats not goin in me"
just bought a $25 eighth from a chick who has a kid. i'm helping my community out right?
she screamed"i told you already! counter clockwise spiral and the clockwise spiral!!" right in the middle of sex
wow, i never thought dating a choreographer would be so harsh
have the fact that the early bird is danced upon by the prettiest strippers be your motivation
Hes pre-made beer lollipops so he "can suck before the sex" QUOTE!
Also what is the name of Americas thing where we had a holy obligation to expand westward? I'm going name my new lighter that.
Today's been pretty great, I went and bought the new Batman for the sole purpose of masturbating to Bane
Drive by water balloon fight on $500,000 boats ended when someone threw a dildo
I really couldn't care less what she looks like. That's why The Lord Our God gave us doggy-style.
Can we just get drunk and watch the Birdcage please I have no tolerance for straight men today
who has a one night stand on Christmas ? But he's pretty attractive so thumbs up
God is tempting me with everything tonight. Brownies and dick, mostly.
Everything is a learning experience. Last night we learned why I'm not allowed to bring guys home from the bar....
Welcome to your 30’s, where every one night stand is most likely with someone’s father
Well, let me first tell you that jack and cokes were ONE FUCKING DOLLAR.. It's like the club wanted me to make poor choices.
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