Good. You are like the clit whisperer.
I can't get into him, he looks really young. I'd feel like I was blowing the Gerber baby.
discovery: the myth about swedish girls giving good head? not a myth.
STOP CALLING ME LADY CHLAMYDIA
I found them on a couch next to the sidewalk screaming at cars with a megaphone. Kevin chased the mailman with a jello shot.
Trumps. I've been wiping my ass with fast food napkins for 3 days.
there's fuck elsewhere to go, I'll be there with 8 lbs of bronzer on my tits
I tried to force my roommate into a sink last night. And I almost won.
Oh and someone pissed in my shoes, so I'll let you figure that out.
I feel like I've asked you "are you okay?" one too many times in the last 48 hours. You're hopeless.
I was going to do a cardio thing but then tacos.
We christened the whole apartment and fucked on the balcony. It was amazing. I'm 100% sure downtown heard me climax. Now we can unpack.
It's pretty self explanatory. You tried to have sex on the hood of a car in front of everyone
BRIAN AND ANTHONY SPOON FED MY BROTHER MACARONI AND CHEESE WHILE HE WAS FUCKING ZARA. THEY WENT TO HIGHFIVE HIM AND ZARA WAS LIKE "WOO!" AND HIGHFIVED THEM FIRST
He had a tattoo of the Batman logo around his asshole. I noped right the hell out of there.
Randomize
