Just got yelled at by a priest...again.
In retrospect, pretending to punch a 9 year old girl in the face was a terrible analogy to use in a piano lesson.
i cant decide if i should go fuck j*** or keep watching real genius
You totally narrated your dogs thoughts for 2 and a half hours last night, and I was enthralled. I didn't say one word, I just listened.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Just used my last prints at the library for brackets instead of final reviews. Hello March.
I'm pretty sure this isn't my phone, but I do like these nude pics
at this point every shot is just a haymaker to my liver
you left me with this keg alone. this is on your hands
i asked the cop if we could stop and do a chinese firedrill.... he said no.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
As part of the off-hours team building exercises, I had my new coworkers figure out to push me back to the hotel from the nearby bars in a shopping cart every night for a week.
Anyways, he came over at 3:30 am and ate me out while I ate pizza on the counter
She invited us over for cocaine and donuts
I'll explain later but I just had to legally commit to abstinence for the next 4 months
First non virgin Sunday. Bursts into flames.
HEY I WILL KIDNAP THE FUCK OUT OF YOUR PET GOAT
Randomize