my ultimate dream in life is to have sperm so powerful that it will rival that of jim bob duggar.
is it sad that i can masturbate and get my big O just from thinking about a Tiffany engagement ring?
i woke up convinced that my room was backwards i tried to go into the closet to get outta my room
what is TOTES MCGOATS in spanish?
Just TALKING to him is better than banging my bf, imagine what actual banging will be like.
I met him yesterday and now he's wanting to hold hands and kiss in public. i hate this
I love how kegs are figured into our monthly bills
Another Sunday, another 100 chicken nuggets
I dont care if your mom convinced you it should be an abstinent christmas. I did horribly on finals and i'm out of booze, so you will get over her and FUCK. ME. NOW.
Dude I've kinda accepted I may leave Nola with the clap.
Breathalizer & tazer party did not go as casually as expected.
Her delivery came. She's ordered a pack of 144 condoms.
Is there a polite/non-lush way to ask how alcohol ranks on their list of priorities? Because like idk how to break the ice furreal.
Remember how I made that resolution to remain celibate for 6 months? Well, I just broke that
You literally made that 4 hours ago...
I look over and the both of you are naked, and he's eating chicken nuggets off the floor
Randomize
