I never noticed this but I have a beauty mark on my labia minora
Please tell me how you discovered this.
I was looking in the mirror snooping around
Baby momma caught me doing baby daddy in reverse cowgirl. She kicked me out and i have no clothes, come get me.
I hope you walked the shit out of that shame.
I found your dream girl. She looked 11 but drove and on her key chain it said "if i am not wasted the day is"
just saw bouncers outside a coffee shop. beginning to question humanity.
We made a drinking game out of poaching eggs. When did our life turn into a really awesome version of Top Chef?
she must of just birthed a child cause her labia touched the floor
i'm 6 minutes and 3 drinks deep before she gets here. she's do-able for a wednesday night, but i still need to mentally prepare, ya know?
Well, they emptied out the keg by the third kegstand for America.
Last I saw him was around 10 this morning. He was passed out on the porch with his head under the barbeque cover and there were cups of orange juice around him as well as loose tobacco spread everywhere. Good luck getting a hold of him.
She called all of my friends to find out where I was last night. 7 out of ten said their place.
She walked in on her brother jacking off and she hasn't been the same since. She's been crying and shaking non-stop. It's been two weeks.
You told me if you could get your shoes on, you deserved a coke and rum. We never made it to the party.
So i know i shouldnt being spending random large amnts of money...but i just bought a sword.
and then you called me a third time and yelled that you were stealing a puppy named Willow
Tbh I’m not a vibrator enthusiast
But I am godly
Randomize
