I created a new tequila drink. it is a mix of excitement and fear instilled in innocent people.
i wanna do a homemade sex video in sepia and pretend were in the early 20th c
i want two things in life...emily to stop talking and a block of cheese.
come over
yeah sure
wait who is this again? my contacts got deleted...but tell me and ill be there in 10
i need a lesbian romance or unplanned pregnancy for some spicein my life.
My jaw hurts. Such a slutty injury..
They were so loud I wrote them a sex critique and taped it to his door.
DO IT, or I'll send you pictures of my hickey to remind you of your loneliness
In between rounds of sex, you stopped and did drunken handstand push-ups.
May or may not have just put tequila in my special "kids+" orange juice fortified with vitamins a, b, c, d, e, and now t.
The only math I use in every day life is figuring out how much I can spend on alcohol and still have money to pay my bills. High school lied to us.
I DID MY EXPERIMENTING. FOUR YEARS OF IT. IN HIGH SCHOOL.
How many fucks given?
0.12846
The guy I'm talking to drunk texted me his essay last night and he asked me to revise it
Like, defending PBR and Bio Dome consumes a lot of my time.
Randomize
