i miss you so much
i miss you too
oops, did i send that to you? i meant to send it to the money you owe me
Does he know anything about your personal life besides what you look like without clothes on?
Just to clear things up. I did not walk in on him jacking off to your facebook profile.
We need to stop sleeping with people based on which NFL team they like.
I just found pizaa roll in my hair. Already been to class today
Holy fucking shit the worst thing for a hangover ever--A FUCKING BOLLYWOOD MOVIE BLARING IN CLASS
Welcome to a new world. May the gods of weed smile upon you as you embark on exploring this new dimension.
Apparently I showed all your grooms men my vagina to prove I did not have underwear on. Awesome
I'm pretty sure your ex of four years just had a baby with some kid and named it after you...
Any chance the bar is open now? Also who's wedding is this?
He told me that he's proud of our abnormalcy as a couple. I think it's the most romantic thing he's ever said.
The moment when you go to plug in someone else's phone in your car and your lube is in the way. Don't mind that it's just my center console car lube. Normal.
I might go bald with this hair pulling thing every night.
We're meant to be. Apparently God wants me to get dicked down pretty good too so I'm not complaining about destiny
I'm smoking and watching the Muppets Treasure Island. Where are you?
Something about that statement reminds me just how much of a role model you are, sis.
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