remember them days when you seriously wanted your mom to marry rev run and we would always talk shit about justine?
joeyyyy why you always taken cheeseburgers from me?!?!?!
the bride spent most of the night apologizing to people she had punched earlier.
Just for future reference: milk is NOT a good mixer no matter how drunk you are.
Bring a bathing suit for the glitter slip n slide
Yea you just drank all the Hookah water, then started talking gibberish about the Kool Aid you just drank.
I world jack off literally anyone now that I'm not related to.
I am trying to take a picture of a man in a wheelchair trying to ship a michael jackson portrait
Some girl took her panties off, soaked them in vodka and wrung them out into a line of guys' mouths! Awesome!
No, NOT awesome. Where the fuck do you go drinking!?!
A lumberjack bearing the gift of small oranges or gymnast sex... I love you man but you lose that battle 9 out of 10
I believe in using alcohol to heal from the inside. Not as a topical solution.
I feel like a pet sloth would complement my lifestyle.
After you puked in the bathtub you claimed you were never eating quesadillas again and you never even ate a quesadilla
all i remember is slapping you in the face with a slice of pizza while laughing maniacally.
Had a very good bday. Have the teeth marks and bruises to prove it
I guess when the asshole said “I really miss you and want to get back together” he actually meant “I’m banging a Hooters girl behind your back.”
I hope she gives him gonorhea
Randomize
