Hahaha, sighhhh...I texted him to no response. It's a shame, really...I would gladly exchange my body for pizza rills.
He just posted pic of sad weiner and half a butt cheek. That is it. I HATE online dating.
my mom just asked me about sexting and if I have ever sent a naked picture to anyone. i fucking hate fox news.
The guy in the next stall screamed courtesy flush and then puked. Bless you Vegas
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Ummm I just broke my no puke streak at church
He busted his lip while trying to keep from passing out in the pool. The hotel people don't seem to be too concerned that we're passing around a bottle of SoCo at 11 am.
HE IS COURTING ME WITH CHINESE FOOD AND IT IS WORKING.
I taught her to play Monopoly. She sold me her bra to keep from going bankrupt.
Got another job?
If by job you mean clever way of getting free tattoos, then yes. I got another job.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
The bartender had to walk me home last night. New high or new low?
Fuck off I wasn't that drunk. I was still able to toss froot loops in the air and catch them in my mouth.
And in your bra. It was quite entertaining.
I opened a bud lite with a fencing sword last night. Yeah you banged that guy.
I feel like every young boy's first wet dream is too have sex with the Pink Ranger. I am now fulfilling that dream for one man. I am a hero.
it's the international house of making me almost fucking shit myself
I feel asleep with my contacts in, with my arms wrapped around a bottle of vodka. Also... Do we have class today?
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