I remember having a drink with vegetables in it. They said it was a mojito, but it tasted like cabbage.
haha i love mojitos
ya and i hate cabbage
I woke up this morning to the buzzer on my oven going off... I cooked fish sticks at 425 degrees for 5 hours last night. my house smells awesome
it's business casual sex. like no kissing, shake hands after, occasional frequency
I love the progression of these pictures. I go from cute to Courtney Love
I got her a Nickelback box set.
So the answer to your question is yes, I was masturbating on the roof of my building.
There needs to be waaaay more alcohol in my apartment if I am going to survive being unemployed
My pupils are so HUGE you can see into my soul from 2 miles away
You know how there are wrinkles in your brain? What if they were filled with potato chips? That's kind of how my head feels now.
Made eye contact with a friendly neighborhood dog walker while violently puking out the window. How's your Wednesday going?
No but I was fuckin done when I realized my acrylic nail caught fire when I was hitting the bong.
I need someone to play with my boobs. Even platonically. I just need a good groping
The nice lady at the neighborhood liquor store informs me that we have a new woman-run neighborhood sex shop. Jesus loves me and wants me to have a happy Valentine's day.
I'm intrigued by how his mouth tasted the same as his dick.
No I don't. You owe me sex and cinnamon rolls.
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