Was it a mistake telling him I couldn't get the abortion until I was 2 months along on the first date?
I think I just made patron unclassy I bought limes at a gas station and for salt we are using gas station packets of salt
Just facebooked the guy whose name you're yelling in there. So you're aware, his interests include "swearing at babies" and "Ice luge"
Just walked by a group of guys calling out walks of shame with a mega phone from their front porch.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
If u were an xman, what would ur power be? I would shoot lasers from my boobs.
Just traded a samurai sword for some drugs. It's gonna be one random ass night
He was drinking a long island through his Breathalyzer tube.
Puuuub goooolf. Being trashed at 830 never felt so right
Dude what hole are you on?....and its 9:15
hole5. 2 under par. irish nachos
You proceeded to get into a playground school bus and yell "all aboard to Margaritaville!"
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I told him finishing at the same time would be a long-term project. Like flipping a house. A sexual house.
After we hooked up, his roommate shouted "I LIKE TO HAVE SEX TOO" from across the apartment
Is it a problem if I'm trying to condition Goodbye Horses to trigger an erection?
I will feed you tacos. I will touch your butt. Happy Valentine's Day ❤️
I look excited, but its just a facade.
He ate me out in the passenger seat of his Range Rover in a Tim Hortons parking lot. I could hear “oh canada” on the radio from a nearby school as I came. Most patriotic orgasm ever!
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