Admittedly I was a little ambitious with some of the positions but you walked in during the worst of it.
it was either a really good one night stand or a really really good first date. thank you online dating
Sudue. BIG CUP LOTS OF NOMNOMD TUOSPY
I'm going to keep a tally of how many lives I ruin this summer. Starting today.
Already at 3 and it's not even noon.
As a matter of fact, I am on the treadmill with the Bottle of UV Blue as we speak.....
Do you remember trying to make pizzas with the domino workers last night...while trying to speak their language with them.. spanish?
that man is just a bundle of powerful magic and poor judgment
I've realized that I'm going to have to wake and bake every morning to make it through the summer without killing someone. This is ridiculous.
Thanks to that wedding, I got to use the term "finger bang" more than I have since high school.
Well, we all woke up in drag with no memory of why we were in drag. On the plus side, this shade of lipstick looks really good on me.
A shark bit my leg in the Gulf of Mexico well me and the T were banging so look for it in the papers
Whoever said it shouldn't take a man to make you happy clearly wasn't having sex everyday.
If you're with any of them tell them i apologize for (insert whatever i did here)
Should I be concerned that he called me mom when I got in bed on top of him?
I mean, who hasn’t been fingered in there back of an Uber?
Randomize
