I stood up and a chip flew out of my shirt and landed in the chip dish. I just walked away.
she's about as cool as a sandpaper handjob.
No joke. Last we saw of him he was naked and dragging that stupid goat into the bushes.
she said we were using the spray butter as air freshener
I really want to go out tonight but part of me wants to be able to honestly tell the judge tomorow that I didn't
Im in Ft Meyers right now looking right at an alligator. I have had a couple of beers and people are telling me not to feed him but Im gonna do it anyway.
My mom now keeps ice cubes on hand for my bong water. We may be able to work this relationship out.
That's actually a fantastic idea... The kinky sex dungeon will be vastly improved by the addition of a lightsaber
He had "Bad Bitches Only" tattooed above his dick. I don't know his name but I hope I find him again. I also don't feel that I lived up to the challenge.
No it was good. I serenaded the holding cell occupants with a fabulous rendition of Making Love out of Nothing at all. It was fucking amazing!
Please tell your sister I apologize about saying her baby may have beef curtains. That was inappropriate.
Sometimes I look at her and just start choking. She is that much of an evil entity.
Why would you get kicked out?
Well, an overweight man is currently not wearing a shirt. Or pants. And is getting in touch with his inner Chippendale. You can probably fill in the blanks.
I just bought six bottles of the 2 dollar vodka. oh yes there will be blood
We had everything under control until this one jackass fucked up. Thanks, Peter.
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