South Carolina's governor once cited "moral legitimacy" when he was a congressman voting for President Bill Clinton's impeachment. Karma is a bitch.
I wonder how skeet ulrich feels about the skeet skeet phrase and and what it denotes.
She came to work with 6 additional layers of make-up, playing every Nickelback song about explicit teen sex, and with a dozen twinkies she bet she could finish without chewing any. I'm investing in a rape whistle.
You missed out on a serious adventure. Cops were called. We put a chicken in someones house.
Just woke up from a dream where you lived in a gingerbread house on a snowy cliff by the sea. The dolphins were swimming away from a giant dust storm. You REALLY ought to smoke this before bed tonight.
Hes stumbling drunkenly around the streets of New York with a balloon vagina on his head. I'd say hes having a good night.
This dude has my number from April last year. Drunk me left sober me a puzzle. No confirmation of pants off business
You know, you have a good excuse now if you have a poor performance. Just say "what do you expect? I took a paintball to the DICK!!"
Everywhere I look there's another kitten this is so ideal
Can I live on acid? Kittens man. Kittens.
Thanks so much for having me, I'm really sorry that I almost caused your dog to catch on fire and also for breaking your doorknob
I had the choice between 9 burritos and 1 girl...
And...?
Have you ever eaten pizza and gotten your dick sucked at the same time? Because I have pizza.
I should not be able to sum up my life with a taco brand motto...
My neck is sore from all the headbanging. And I can't tell the difference between the jello stains and cum stains.
YOU CANT JUST BLOW GUYS BC THEY’RE NICE TO YOU LEXI
I CAN IF I WANT TO
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