Sandwiches eeeeeeverywhere.
Important life lesson - flammable and inflammable mean the same thing
We are the drunkest people in Toys R' Us right now
I'm proud of our boobs and what they could potentially achieve in life.
Life is so much better when you know you're gonna get laid soon.
By the way, turns out "Danny B" is his penis. Not his cousin. I was right.
if I see a bottle of vodka right now I'll probably throw up gum I swallowed when I was a kid
For once I want to have sex without having to google the after effects of it.
She said "I've been waiting to suck your cock since high school." I'm so glad so many freshmen are from our school.
I mean it was fine and all but I just don't understand why a man would need all that Simon Cowell paraphanelia
SUNS OUT COOCHY OUT
Bring me pizza. I'll trade you your underwear you left here for 2 slices.
To be fair, this is a tequila-while-rewatching-Benedict-Cumberbatch-as-Van-Gogh idea, so I don't know if it will hold up tomorrow.
I have standards. Maybe not when it comes to men.. but definitely when it comes to sex
Just a typical Friday. Dinner, drinks, doing lines with a member of Congress
Randomize
