She was Ugg boots AND a Bumpit. Of course I didn't sleep with her.
I'm cleaning my bathroom. That being said I found a klonopin and dropped it and stepped on it. Floor is clean im gonna snort it.
Walk of Shame'd halfway down a mountain, skiiers passing. Do not drink with lifties at the end of ski season.
He rode my dog to the bathroom and wouldn't stop laughing once he got in. It was scary.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Someone was asleep on the couch next to us and woke up. We paused and he yelled "gentlemen, behold! Sex!"
you had acid sex with the barista. why is my bucket list your tuesday?
Update is I am officially king of Gettysburg. Tam and I are being threaded like royakt. In bought e ruined a drink
just woke up in a camero on the way to nebraska, i would appreciate it if you answered your phone.
Four times in one night? That Energizer bunny outfit lived up to the hype.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Hey its me your friend who impressed the pharmacist by already knowing the generic version of plan b by name
I wanna fuck that hideous moustache right off your face. get the confetti ready for the festivities
I just saw someone dressed as a bear leave your house on a motorcycle. I guess you guys are having a good time.
We are the best cocktail. We look appealing, taste amazing, and ruin lives.
I really need to stop sending pussy pics if I'm going to be running for state representative in November
well I ran around the park drunk with a plastic baby and fell, all while screaming "I WILL PROTECT YOU CARLOS", yeah there's video
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