big game today.. looking forward to seeing that magic win, and then i will celebrate with a nude dip in lake Eola.. anyone else in??
So we tried to 69 with him on top. NEVER TRY IT. His balls were in my eyes and it was terrifying.
he thinks im joking when i say don't visit. i mean it's summer...he was the college fuck and now it's time for the summer fuck
Its Friday night, and I'm sitting at home watching are you smarter then a 5th grader, drinking vodka. I got every single question wrong. Clearly you see where I'm headed in life.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Romer got arrested for getting in a bar fight with a bus boy because he was trying to steal a keg, had it all the way to the car
I have already decided that it happened in an alternate universe since both of the people involved don't remember it and we only have the word of a sober person that it happened at all
So would it be tacky to offer my services as a future attorney as an engagement gift for her?
You need to braveheart it on Monday. Blue face paint and a loin cloth screaming freedom in your front yard.
Nothing is working I'm going to die alone and on hold with a State Farm representative
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
My plan for the weekend: 1) Get shit faced in Vegas. 2) Not die
Well, my mom found the ball gag and whip. Looks like I'm never going home again.
I will be wearing a suit out more cuz it has been decided i rage harder with a power tie
YOU'RE NOT THE ONE BEING EVISCERATED BY YOUR OWN UTERUS SO GET SOME DAMN SLEEP YOU FOOL!
I think a major source of concern would be the fact you snorted a shot. Who does that?
My roommate just angrily told the cat he should have knocked, but that's not lockdown madness. They're always like that.
Randomize