If you text me again I will gut all of your stuffed animals.
i just looked up and i was like omg ballsack and then i didnt know what to do
can u get pink eye on your cock?
I just found three unopened cans of PBR behind our futon that I think I was saving for winter.
Turning 21 on Saint Patty's day. I like to think this is what my alcoholic ancestors have prepared me for
It wasn't a wasted relationship. I got road-head in an Escalade. I still keep that with me.
Just hit on a fat chick so shed buy me a drink. Then i walked away. Nice to see how the other half lives.
any chance you can send me your legal ethics outline, in exchange for say, me buying you a lapdance the next time we go to the strip club?
I asked you if you were ok and you said "dude I'm fine, I'm in the recovery position"
Currently coming up with judgment, the game. Works well on buses, will probably be more entertaining in bars.
He's like a perfect storm of amazing hair and horrible judgment.
When you're not at your house I assumed you're somewhere having sex
Also this guy in my contact as hairy jerry sent me a pic of him shirtless and said I miss you and I have no idea who he is /when or if I met him but that's not normal?!
your penis is a great and majestic leader among the penises.
He fired me, I fucked his wife, we're even I think...
Randomize
