Shitting during a conference call is so empowering.
(917) i just came from walking.
haha you just came from walking?
you freaked out because you thought your face lotion was cum in a bottle
I envy you so much. I get girls who pee on my floor and you get girls who leave in the middle of the night
5 am is for sleeping. Or getting railed on by a stranger. But never for fundraising. Get real.
We had a long talk in which he told me he respects me more than any other girl. 30 minutes later, I got a facial.
she showed up with nothing but olive garden breadsticks in her purse.
You face planted into a car door. And somehow didn't drop your burrito.
So I peed on what I thought was a wall while in nashville come to find out while running from the cop it was just a dark tinted window and the while bar witnessed me peeing
The guy I fucked in San Diego is camping with us for coachella... Awk.
I think I may have walked up to her while she was with her friends and asked for a "do over".
I found a half composed text to you this morning and all it said was HELP M. Is that how I ended up at the bottom of the stairwell in only a tee-shirt and one heel?
considering I never received the text I would go with 'yes'.
next time we make out at a concert please try to refrain from screaming out our hotel room number.. the amount of guys that knocked on our door after you passed out was ridiculous
Literally breaking up to my boyfriend while jamming out to Feraglicious
What type of bandaid should I use on my clit
Randomize
