His stupid grin looks like he's mid-ejaculation
And if you don't call me, I will embarrass you publicly with a can of spray cheez.
we ike ciroccccc we love patroneeeee shost shothosthsothosthostsssss veryboyddddyyyy
go home
and I asked her"are you allergic to condoms latex like your older sister " she said "Idk this is gonna be my 1time"
You bit the bartender when he refused to poor rum in your purse and hand you a straw.
I am never taking advice from you again. The high heels in the shower were a bad idea. I orgasmed and almost drowned.
I won't drink with you again until you promise to not feed me anymore paper bags
Some idiot from high school is in the hospital for bonging three beers up his ass
He should have died. Natural selection.
June 16th my calendar just says boobietassels....I can only assume that has to do with you
N.C. cops just used a megaphone to tell me I have a slutty outfit. My life is complete.
Unless you're gonna start buying my underwear, you have got to stop ripping it off of me.
Im about to smoke a huge bowl. My penis is so happy. Who needs girls.
Landen experienced Greenville for the first time last night. He was awaken by 2 cops and 4 EMS guys this morning in the bed of that truck that is for sale at the swashbuckler carwash, said he was trying to walk to waffle house... Greenville- 1, Landen- 0
I even put my vibrators back in the bedroom instead of the coffee table. If that's not growing up then I don't know what is.
conclusion: canadians have really freaky sex
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