i wonder if i could find a boyfriend who would call me big papa
sure if you go to prison
the 24 hour champagne diet aint going so well
you're thinking of things to pack this weekend and you think Don King wig?
You tried to tell her that the salad was an afrodisiac then proceeded to stroke yourself with the feather duster
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
he fucked me to the beat of the construction going on outside my house. i will never look at jackhammers the same ever again.
He only had napkins in the bathroom... no toilet paper. If I fuck him, am I settling?
Bro, she used the potato bongs to make French fries after. She's deff a keeper.
You may want to re-read your sent texts from last night. You were texting me about your "fire shits" spelled 6 different ways between 3 and 5:30 AM.
There should be a rule.......that if you have a small penis you must wear a hat with propellers on it so you can fly the hell off the planet.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Next time a party gets busted lets get a group photo first.
Getting "I couldn't find the front door so I climbed in through window" drunk seems to be a habit of yours
After he finished he laid there and told me how much work that just was. I looked at him and told him not to ruin a good thing by opening his mouth.
That's not the problem. The problem is I thought I was over him but he smells nice today.
When your grandma invites you to a sweet girls' Valentine's dinner with your mom and sister, but you have to decline because you're trying to get two dudes to rail you at once...
what happened to you last night?
I dunno man, i pissed in a urinal, sent you a picture of my vagina and woke up with 25 bar stamps on my arms.. you tell me
Randomize