Just saw my gyno in public. Weird to see her hands outside of my vagina.
No more Irish car bombs ever.
He dumped me and I don't wanna fuck his best friend for revenge. Is this what maturity feels like?
Every time I remember you're bi, the world gets a little brighter.
Then you started screaming that this was the first time you did e and that you had a 4.8 gpa, that was right before you almost suffocated between that one girl's tits.
No. And Marissa said shitting in the handicap bathroom at work does not get you into the club. You have to shit yourself. She said.
Looking at an apartment in Houston. It's right beside my favorite bar and the zoo. Best or worst decision?
seeing two freshman taking a cab home at noon on a Monday makes me realize how much worse my life choices could have been
His personality is sparkling but nothing beats his ass
Can we go one day without you telling me that your dick misses me
I woke up in a limo in long Island, Ny this morning. Talk about a black out
We were having sex but then he spanked me and i punched him but it was just a reflex i swear
Only I could dislocate my ribcage coaching volleyball and still want to get drunk tonight.
Its because she suspects I'm a frequent drug user, which I am, but I am going to make her feel like she is crazy for believing it.
She's wear your skin crazy! Is it wrong that I'm gonna fuck her 1 more time though?
Randomize
