I painted my nails silver
And what are the implications of that?
Is there supposed to be a msg in that? Just thought ud like to know it looks like I fingerbanged an alien
Why can't I find a man that likes bush instead of a vagina that looks like it belongs to a prepubescent child!
Because men are children
Touche
i just unintentionally masturbated to my own facebook picture
headbutted the bartender, tried to bite the bouncer, and pissed on a cops shoes. and i still got laid. god, it's good to be home
i think i am going to devote my summer to making my cats internet celebrities
and hes going back to rehab like me, so we have common interests
i put his shirt in a ziplock bag to preserve his smell
please tell me you are kidding me
We're trying to leave but amy's hitting on the guy who mans the nacho cart
Dude, they are shaking the RV, yell at them. It feels like i'm being rocked to sleep, I don't like it, I'm not a baby.
ya i guess you have to take things with a grain of salt in a place where nipple clamps are the norm..
I just realized that the thing that smelled like an electrical fire in my house was me.
Oh hey. I left my beer there. Beer is more important than my pride. I want to pick that up.
Dude a gay guy just Sparta kicked this Samoan guy for calling him a flamer you need to get down here the free kamakazee shots haven't even started yet
Question #1: Why am I on my living room floor? Question #2: Where did the bloody footprints come from? Question #3: Why are there two McChickens next to the wine bottle?
We bird danced in front of the bird cages for 20 minutes. I think it was our way of being like fuck you guys you're in a cage and we're on summer break.
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