dude, your ex-bf is on match.com
details on that.
well, his profile doesn't say anything about herpes.
ironically, his detergent was also "small and mighty"
She called herself a train and then took off all her clothing. I forget everything after that.
I saw you two flinging Jello at the sidewalk if that helps jog your memory.
Its not monday til someone throws up in the hallway
All I got from that conversation with the officer was "blah blah blah, you're disgusting, blah blah blah, $500 fine, blah blah blah, be in court Tuesday."
i turned my shower on this morning and passionfruit pulp came out. how did you even do that?
She has puke on the back of her shirt not quite sure how the hell she did that
I love you more with every blowjob.
You should write for Hallmark.
Just took last nights make up off with a sock. That hungover.
legit question. can i put a condom down our garbage disposal? my rents are coming over in 20
I can't even express how horny I am. The English language isn't equipped for what I'm plotting.
I'm going to three dry weddings this month. I'm flashing three dry weddings this month
I was drunk and really grossed out when you poured cheese on me and, I guess I just freaked out.
I just unmatched him. If your Thirsty Thursday only consists on the gym then I am not the woman for you ✌🏻️
I just thought you should know that you should be proud of your dick. It's pretty much perfect. Just, ya know, by the way.
Randomize
