i never told you how having a club foot got me laid
Annd you probably wouldn't of fallen down the stairs if you didn't insist on taking 'finale shots'
He kept insisting that I was going to have an orgasm but it just felt like he was rubbing sand paper on my vagina
Dude, you walked in on me 5 times each times you had a different person with you. And each time you lifted the covers up and said 'whats going on in here'
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
No... No really he actually thought the condom was meant for his hand...
well someone pooped in the lint basket in the laundry room last night, but none of us will admit to it so we're all just secretly judging each other and doubting ourselves.
just got home. some guy on my porch is tryin to show me his balls. no more parties at my apartment.
Ok, was I really fucked up or was there a chick from Norway in the ice cream shop teaching us Norwegian last night?
my mom found me passed out in the kitchen floor with the Brita pitcher.. Happy Mothers Day
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
So Monday we're lesbians.
Deal. This decision is final and any rebates on this will result in losing an eyeball.
I'm actually drinking gin and juice out of a floridas natural carton...so if that has any indication of how I'm doing
I literally walked into the toilet, looked at my reflection, said "alcohol" and went back to bed...
My inner 10 year old alcoholic is intrigued.
She was screaming and crying about how she couldn't find her middle finger. Then, she threw her body on to the pavement. Thats the last time we buy a freshmen a handle.
idk what the male equivelent of vajazzling is but it better be worth the time
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