I hate to tell you this, but your sister reeks of whore.
No, that was before the police came, but after the hooker.
Puked on a Tom Jones impersonator on the strip
dude, boobs are like the porridge in goldylocks
she "accidentally" hit me with her car, its almost as if she know im fucking her boyfriend.
You started throwing frozen shot glasses at people and you kept saying "it's fine, they melt."
You're the only person I know who could blow literal chunks, laugh about it, then proceed to shotgun another beer. Love you champ.
Didn't get carded at the bar. We're getting wasted and then walking over to Bass Pro Shops to watch the indoor ducks swim around. And possibly buying a tent.
I feel like she is getting all kinds of bacterial exposure that may otherwise have been avoided had she been wearing pants
Can I tell you that I just incorporated the spice girls in my sexting and you not judge me
Seriously insulted!! You can not share my dick pick with your gay brother. He won't quit poking me on fb
Just did body shot off a midget. Pretty good start.
AND ONCE AGAIN, MY VAGINA HAS STRUCK AGAIN. HER PLANS TO TAKE OVER MARYLAND ARE WELL ON THEIR WAY AS SHE CONTINUES TO ENGULF EVERY QUEER IN A 10 MILE RADIUS
just curious, were the inflatable penis' received? Amazon says they were delivered.
We go out and drink, fuck, and I stay the night. He agrees to it because he knows I'll hook him up to IV fluids in the morning. Everyone wins
Randomize
