i now know from two sources i am better at making out and giving head than she is. and not by a little either.
they said he just opened the front of his shirt and threw up alll over himself
My mother's day gift to my mother is to promise never to tell her 95% of the stories I've accumulated in my life.
I'm slowing backing away from her. I tried breaking up with her and it felt like I was clubbing baby seals.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Her parents walked in on us. So for my birthday they bought me a blow-up doll with their daughters face on it. I don't know what to think right now.
Jesus christ how hard is BRING SNACKS AND DRUGS to interpret? I trust your judgement on this one.
I couldn't help thinking that my sock monkey was judging me
I gasped. Both pairs of lips did.
My tuesday consisted of speaking to a federal agent for two hours and watching a roving band of gypsies jump over a fire until 2:30am
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
The last thing I remember is crying and shaking my head as she was putting salt on my hand. I guess I took the shot
We're about to play the try not to vom at the president's house game...
Well yes he stayed. He brought Guiness, them he shaved me. It's a long, but beautiful story.
We found him. He was passed out in a McDonalds booth with at least 6 big Mac wrappers. The employee said he kept yelling that he was in America and had the freedom to have big macs. Fucking Italians...
People don't believe me when I say the bruises are from work. They just smile and say "right." Trust me, I WISH my sex life was that exciting.
CTFD. There’s plenty of dick in the sea! This is Vegas, we import dick. \nWorst case scenario we get a rental penis
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