Too bad my picture didn't come thru. It was one of me naked riding a unicorn with a wizard hat and a magic staff. And the unicorn had wings. And me too.
The worst thing about having a parent with a prius is that they can walk in on you without any warning
Watching NYC prep. Doing a shot everytime one of these d-bags flips his hair. I give it 10 minutes before alcohol poisoning set in.
FYI don't ever, ever get a lap dance from a stripper who says " she's having a bad day " at a bachelor party.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
oh and if she happens to say anything about a cantalope and tissues... just go with it
please just be careful, i just switched my facebook status to "in a relationship", i would look really pathetic if i had to change it back to "single" already
I don't know the quality of the hand jobs you've received in the past but it CLEARLY was not one from me
no i brought the cat to the bar. I got a weird look when I walked in but now everyone loves her.
I have your dog in a headlock. Se wants my mushrooms.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I sleep with the gay men, they no longer have questions about their sexuality. No strings attached at it's finest and i get new shopping buddies out if it. It really is a win win situation.
You are my idol.
How am I supposed to stop smoking pot when girl scout cookies are being sold.
Did I run away from you last night?
Yeah it was a great moment for our friendship
I woke up naked on my couch playing a video game I thought I had dreamed about... oh yeah, and someone cut my hair.
She was from Wisconsin, she had great boobs... I mean... It's a dairy state....
I accidentally sent my mom a nude picture of my ass... she replied with how did you get that angle ?
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